#WeekendCoffeeShare–When Teacher Britta Takes the Wheel

If we were having coffee, I’d start off by saying IT’S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU (really slowly and overly enthusiastically, too, because I’ve been Teacher Britta for the past two days and Teacher Britta talks really slowly and really enthusiastically….and really loudly).

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you all about how this has undoubtedly been the longest and most rewarding week of my life.

Seriously.

Thailand. Teaching English. This is where I need to be. What I need to be doing. And I’m SOO glad this is my life.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you about language camp. And preparing for language camp. As part of my TESOL course, all the teachers must participate in a two day language camp where we teach to actual Thai students for the FIRST TIME EVER. We were put into groups of two or three and while one of us teaches, the other one or two of us observes and lends a hand if necessary.

The past week has consisted of preparing for language camp. Preparing lesson plans, revising lesson plans, performing practice lesson plans, rushing to the printer, rushing for school Continue reading “#WeekendCoffeeShare–When Teacher Britta Takes the Wheel”

What are You Doing in this Room. Right Here. Right Now.

I’ve spent so much of my life afraid.

Afraid of everything–anything that was different, anything outside my comfort zone, new people and ideas.

Perhaps it came from my own social anxiety and perhaps there was something more….but if there’s anything, I’m a pro at being uncomfortable.

I always felt like there was something inherently different about myself. Not in the “you’re special” type of way but more that I didn’t connect with anyone. I still struggle to build meaningful relationships with people today.

I’ve always been exceptionally independent, but for some reason, growing up, I thought that was weird. I thought being an introvert was weird.

I couldn’t accept myself so I looked for someone else to latch on to.

Enter sexually and emotionally abusive ex-boyfriend of almost two years.

I had never been in a relationship before and I felt like I needed one more than anything in the world. I had my first kiss at 18, and I was kind of ashamed of that. I desired a reationship in high school and there were some potential suitors. But I was sooooo shy it just never happened.

So, when I saw ex-boyfriend in my orientation group at college in the fall of 2011, I decided to pursue him. He was attractive. Quiet. But I was curious.

I don’t regret my relationship with him. I wouldn’t be the person I am without it. He never meant to hurt me. We recently chatted after graduation and he told he felt terrible for what he Continue reading “What are You Doing in this Room. Right Here. Right Now.”

Oh Hey, I Graduated!

Commencement occurred in a perfect sliver of time on Saturday. Seriously. The sun was bright, the sky was clear. It was cool, but not cold (though I was still very warm underneath my black gown). Within a half hour after the ceremony finished, the clouds started rolling in. It’s been raining pretty much non-stop ever since. We got so lucky with the gorgeous weather and I’m SO thankful I was able to graduate outside on my beautiful college campus on the prairie.

— — —

Being a college graduate is a funny thing. Well, to be more accurate, this period of transition is a funny thing. Leaving campus today was extremely bittersweet. As I was driving away, part of me wanted to turn around and speed back to the place I’ve called home for four years.

The other part of me, however, knew that I couldn’t do that. It’s time to move on. It’s time to experience more of the world, to learn and grow outside of a university setting.

What’s next for me, then, you might be wondering.

Well, first, home. I’m sitting on my childhood bed at home right now typing this post up. I haven’t been home since early January and here I am. Writing on my childhood bed.

I’m spending the summer at home. My goal is to find a temporary job, to
hang out with the high school friends I haven’t seen in a while and the college Continue reading “Oh Hey, I Graduated!”

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