I’ve thought many times over about creating a new blog and letting this one go.
In 2.5 years that I’ve written at this site, I’ve grown a lot. If you ever go back into this blog’s archives, you’ll find that my voice has been consistently changing. My writing has improved significantly since I started this blog, and my voice has grown with me.
If you ever go back into my blog’s archives, you’ll also find some pretty embarrassing stuff (I won’t willingly provide those links for you, but you can find them if you do enough sifting). As I look back at them, some of the things that were taking up my thoughts during my senior year of college were quite immature. Even in the last year (damn, the last month) I’ve matured (and am continuing to mature) in a lot of ways, and the voice I utilize in my writing reflects that.
It would be easy to delete everything, to belittle my past thoughts and mindsets as not worthy of seeing the light of day ever again. Indeed, there are a couple posts I have done that with–in one way or another, I found them inappropriate to have on my blog. That’s a rare occurrence, though, and I prefer to not make that the norm.
When it all comes down to it, my blog is my story. Since my senior year of college, I’ve documented so much that is important to me here. While I haven’t been blogging a whole lot lately because I’ve been so internally focused the past few months, this blog is still part of my life and it’s still where so much of early twenties have been documented. I don’t want to give that up.
We spend so much time erasing the parts of ourselves that we don’t like–trying to change ourselves to fit a mold, what is perceived to be socially acceptable. In doing so, we deny who we truly are, and what a great disservice that is to ourselves.
This blog is me. My 21 year old declarations of love. My 22 year old desire for adventure. My 23 year old confused-as-all-hell self–who’s starting to make sense of it all.
In a month, I’ll be 24 and who knows what I’ll bring to this blog then.
It’ll still be here.
I could delete it…but I won’t.