I am restless.
I am ready to move out into the world.
If I wasn’t so hell bent on getting a double major, I could be doing just that right now (I only have one more requirement to graduate folks–my English senior seminar–and since I’ve already completed my history degree, I could have graduated this semester…if I wasn’t already so determined to get that English degree).
I head back to college on Tuesday and the idea of it makes me cringe a little bit.
Morris has been so good to me. I can’t imagine spending my four years of college anywhere else. I wouldn’t want to spend my four years of college anywhere else. It was a perfect stepping stone for me between the comforts I knew of living with my parents and being provided for, and the real world where I will become solely responsible for myself. I have learned so much at Morris–both inside and outside the classroom–and I have made lasting friendships.
My little school on the prairie will always hold a special place in my heart.
But, damn, I’m ready to go. Like, now.
Last night, I visited one of my high school friends at the apartment she recently moved in to and I felt even more of a yearning to be done with school. I’m eager to have a place to call my own. I’ve loved living on campus these last four years and I’ve learned so much during my three years of working for res life. I’m eager to get out of a residence hall setting, though.
I’ve been missing Washington D.C. like crazy lately and I know I need to go back there. I feel like I belong there more so than I’ve ever felt in the Twin Cities. I feel like I could easily call D.C. home…hell, it already is home…it became home this summer.
I know the “real world” will be filled with responsibilities that I don’t have now. I know how relaxed my life is now–even though I stay up way too late doing homework (though that is more a result of my procrastination than anything else) and am generally tired and over stressed during the semester, my life is pretty darn relaxed. I know it wont be once I have bills to pay, an apartment to clean, food to make for myself, and a job to go to on a daily basis.
I’m ready, though. I’m ready for a bit more of a challenge. I’m ready for all of that like I’ve never been before.
I’ve heard it said that your college years are the best years of life. I simply refuse to believe that.
There is so much more out there waiting for me past college. So many more opportunities to learn and grow. So many more years for adventure, for maintaining friendships and building up new ones, to love and to be loved, for really living as life should be lived–with open eyes and an open heart, a sense of appreciation for all that is and all that’s to come.
College has been such an amazing stepping stone for me. I’m unbelievably thankful for that. When graduation comes around in May though, I’ll be ready. I’ll be so ready to pick up my bags and greet the rest of my life with open arms.
In the meantime, I’m going to try my best to enjoy my last semester at Morris. No, I’m not that excited to go back, but I don’t want a bad attitude to get in the way of living in the present and appreciating all that I have waiting for me back at school while I still have it to go back to–friends who have become family, professors who care, and all the comforts that come with familiarity on my small little campus on the prairie.
In other news, I just applied for graduation. Shit just go real, peeps…and I couldn’t be more excited.