My brain is fried today.
I spent all of last night and a part of this morning working on my history senior seminar. I only have seven pages of my paper. I know I should have more given that my rough draft is due on Tuesday. I keep telling myself that that’s seven pages I didn’t have a few days ago. My senior seminar still has a long way to go. Did I mention my rough draft is due Tuesday? I keep having to remind myself that a rough draft is just that…rough. There is going to be nothing beautiful about it and as long as I have all the basic ideas down on paper is some way, shape, or form, I’ll be alright. I’m shooting for twenty pages with this rough draft, but we’ll see what happens.
I have a lot of reading to do tonight, but I can’t focus right now on any homework. I’m going to head off to the gym soon to get a much needed work out in. Right now, sitting down to write a blog post is some much needed down time.
It’s getting to that point in the semester where life as I know it just stops happening and I become a bit of a mechanical robot. Class. Homework. Eat. Homework. Homework. Sleep. Repeat. Friends become a thing of the past. Talk of a solid eight hour’s rest at night would be a laughable matter if my current sleep schedule, or lack of one, wasn’t actually such a serious issue. But really, sleep is so important and I don’t get enough of it. Extracurriculars are no longer as fun as they used to be, as I often find myself thinking during them, “I could be getting soo much done right now.” I have actively scheduled a very small and precious amount of “me” time into my schedule or I would actually fail at life.
To make matters worse, a family of silverfish have decided to make a cozy home in my room and dealing with them is a constant battle. Okay, I’ve actually had them the whole semester. I’ve been trying to to get an exterminator in to my room, but to no avail. What started out as a tiny problem has turned into a bit of a major issue…these small little creatures can actually do a lot of damage. Their colony is growing and they are becoming ever persistent. I thought they would go away when it got cold out because they thrive in humidity. It’s November and I keep my fan on high and my window open at all times so it gets pretty darn cold in my room, to the point where I have to wear multiple layers to keep warm. Despite all this effort, THE SILVERFISH JUST WONT DIE! So much for only thriving in humidity. By this point in the semester, my lack of sleep and overly busy schedule has allowed my impatience with inconvenience to rise to an unhealthy level. I am constantly on the look out for them and have become an expert at spotting what I like to call the “silverfish scurry” across my floor (on a side note, have you ever seen a silverfish run for its life? If they weren’t so goddamn disgusting, it would be quite hilarious). I have begun talking to them as I murder them ruthlessly (“Ha ha you thought you could escape this time! mwhahah!” as I raise my foot to stomp the life out of them). I AM PARANOID AND INDIGNANT BECAUSE OF THESE DIRTY BASTARDS! Long story short, if my lack of sleep and overbearing stress wasn’t enough, these unwelcome roomies are making me question my sanity. I only hope I can get someone in to take care of them sooner than later!
Despite my homework load and my unwelcome house guests, I just have to keep reminding myself that it could be worse. It really could. I will survive this semester like I’ve survived every semester before this. I will complete my senior seminar. Despite the stress I’m feeling because of it, I actually love my senior seminar. I get to spend more time with my historical BFF, Montgomery Blair. At the Postal Museum, I wrote about him simply as the Postmaster General under Abraham Lincoln. My history senior seminar is allowing me to delve deeper in Montgomery Blair as a politician and a human being, which is super, super cool!
It’ll all work out in the end and it’ll be alright, even if it doesn’t seem like it now.
I just hope these silverfish wont be the death of me!